Temporary Leave: Thursday 24th

Not that this will effect many people, but this will probably be my last blog until Monday 4th of January. I'm going to New Zealand tomorrow but i'll be able to gain access to internet and be on msn. My phone will also probably be available but I won't be able to use it most of the time because its for the to drivers. So if you want to call or text don't be too surprised if some random asian guy picks up.

Thats pretty much it. I better hand the computer back to my brother before he dies from not playing his computer games for five minutes. (my laptops all packed up).

Christmas Scandal: Wednesday 23rd

As some of you already know, i'm going to New Zealand on Christmas morning. Most of you would think, "Hey what a coincidence!" but the more experienced in acts of asian cheapness would know better.

You see, the fact I usually go overseas every Christmas is a disguise of a cunning plan crafted by my asian parents. The trips may appear to be an enthusiastic response to Christmas, but in fact the plane tickets are just cheap at the time. An added bonus is the crafty excuse not to celebrate Christmas.

So you ask, "Whats so bad about Christmas?

Well, to my parents, Christmas is a time in which you give presents to others which are of no use to you and probably not to them either. In return, you receive presents which are just as useless and a waste of money. These presents are then stored for 12 months until next Christmas in which they are then once again wrapped up and given to other, asian families with also no use of the item.

Not only does this boring cycle of gradual money wasting continue, my parents are also obliged to set up Christmas lights and a Christmas tree. This poses two issues for my money saving, always hurried, asian parents. You can guess them. Yep, it costs money and it costs time. I mean, why set up pretty lights around our house and waste money while you can cook better food with more time?

However, there are good points to Christmas for asians. Conveniently after we come back from our discounted trip, there is a massive sale. Don't get me started on sales.

Well, to wrap it all up. My parents reckon Christmas is a time of money wasting and an annoying interruption in their everyday busy lives. Besides the huge sales after Christmas.

PS. Sorry about the crazy ranting, but there's a surprisingly disgraceful amount to say about the Christmas Scandal in my household.

Chinese Restaurants: Tuesday 22nd

I just came back from a very fulfilling dinner at some chinese restaurant called Iron Chef. Notice that the restaurant name does not have the word "Golden" or "Seafood" or "Crab" or any other mention of seafood. This immediately gave me a very good impression of the restaurant and much to my delight it was actually very good.

Someone who was even happier than me though, was my mum, who didn't seem to be able to stop constantly talking about how much I was eating and how good* the food was.

*This does not necessarily refer to the quality but more about value in this context

Oh and also, any of my friends who wants me to make them a word of the day, tell me on msn. But BEWARE: this is me we're talking about, so if the definition is not satisfactory... You asked for it.

FRIENDS: Monday 21st

Friends are really handy.

They can be put to many uses:

• Someone to laugh with
• Someone to laugh at
• Someone to hide behind
• Someone to talk to
• Someone to ignore
• Someone to annoy
• Someone who annoys you

And last but not least,

• Someone to feed you a drink

Startrek: Sunday 20th

Today has been quite an empty day yet somehow I've been forced to write this blog while watching startrek. I call this a bad case of organisation issues. Right now i'm watching a spaceship getting blown up with a pregnant women inside while checking for spelling mistakes on this blog. This is what i call hardcore multitasking. Omg its a boy :) Uhoh. The father just died.

Anyhow.

The word of the day today is: pearl

(v)1. to fall over.
Vivian pearled after walking into the wall.

(adj)1. Someone who is very uncoordinated who often trips on flat surfaces.

Word of the Day: Saturday 19th

Word of the Day today is: edi (pronounced eh-dee)

(v)1. to slap someone

Pearl eddied Ning because she ate her lunch.

(adj)1. someone who slaps very hard

Stephanie is a real edi when she is angry.

Party: Saturday 19th

Early in the morning, I was ditched by my parents. My brother had come back from annual camp at Hobart and they were going to pick him up from the airport. Surprisingly, my brother was in quite good condition as well as the iPod (thank GOD), very unlike my condition after AFX. Although I did notice that he scoffed down the chocolate balls I saved for him quite quickly.

Not soon after, Ning's mum took me to Thornton's party. After a few serious doubts that we were in the right suburb, Ning and I awkwardly stood around the house. Some time later, Ning, Chenchen and I were sitting around playing monopoly and watching my stack of $1 and $10 notes increase ( I have something with the digit 1). Thornton eventually took pity on us and tried to get us to go to the park to play soccer. However, halfway through the trip someone realised we forgot to bring a ball. It was then the girls ditched the guys, seriously doubting it was going to be much fun at the park. We headed back to the house and somehow sat and ate for an hour.

We didn't do much except try to start a new monopoly game which ended up as a piggy in the middle game with Thornton's little sister being the permanent piggy. Oh, and did I mention how freaky his sister was? She literally cackles and seems to always be high. I have serious suspicions she's helped herself to Thornton's stash of drugs.

We ate some more and then tried to play on a mini pool table. We actually spent a lot of time playing and it soon became 6:30. Seeing that some of the guys including Thornton hadn't come back we ate his cake. Yes. We ate his cake. It was pretty horrible but we seemed to have really bad luck during the time.

1. Ning stole my piece of cake
2. Chenchen dropped her cake and i caught it with my plate O.O
3. Ning's cake somehow went in the wrong way because i made her laugh
4. Ning's strawberry was really sour and she couldn't bite the leafy part off because we were making her laugh.

When Thornton and the other guys came back. We made a feeble attempt at hiding the half eaten cake. But the damage was done, not that he minded.

I'm going to post the Word of the Day separately so I can get this one out first.

Change of Plan: Friday 18th

I can't be bothered turning on my brothers computer so i'm gonna get started on my guan.

Word of the Day: nat

(n) 1. an unexpected surge of happiness usually followed by hysterical laughter

2. someone who is behaving inappropriately ecstatic

Edwina is being a nat right now.

(v) 1. to laugh in a crazy unstoppable manner

2. to uncharacteristically find humour in everything for a short period of time

Due to a sugar overdose, Stephanie is constantly natting.

Stupid Stupid Bus: Friday 18th

Today was quite an eventful one. I had to take public transport entirely from Epping Station to the UNSW for, as some of you know of, my contacts research appointment. I blame the bad train of events on my mum's poor navigational skills but I guess I shouldn't be talking. Well it all started off really well catching the train and getting to the bus stop. However, after waiting for twenty minutes at the bus stop, I began to grow suspicious. A worried looking uni student then approached my mum asking if she knew about the bus strike. I mean seriously. A bus strike. I felt like Pearl, as Ning unhelpfully pointed out.

So we ended up standing in the rain for another twenty minutes trying to get a taxi. Eventually we made it. Half an hour late. But we made it. After the first part of the appointment, our only refuge from the rain was at Mcdonalds. Consequently, i spent 2hrs in Mcdonalds watching little kids distressing their mothers, persevering in their mission for a happy meal. This got really boring after a while until some kid decided to take a dump on the floor. ewwwww. I didn't see it, but I sure saw the expression on the unfortunate janitors face.

Not much happened after the appointment except that we got a ride home from a nice lady my mum made friends with at the university. I also talked to my brother on the phone who reminded me that I promised to try playing Modern Warfare 2. Although that was after I demanded quite impatiently, to know if the iPod was broken yet.

Sorry there's no word of the day. I need to go shower and then play Modern Warfare 2 as promised. I'll do one tomorrow.

Holiday: Thursday 17th

As the title suggests, today is the first day of the summer holidays this year. I evidently haven't quite grasped the concept of holidays, waking up at 7:30am and diving out of bed thinking I was going to miss the bus. It wasn't till I ran into the bathroom that I realised it was the holidays. Secretly relieved that I didn't miss my bus, I crawled back into bed and stoned for about an hour until i fell asleep.

When I finally did wake up at around 10:30am I was yet again tricked by the dramatic school-holiday change, subconsciously reaching for my school uniform.

I also have some bad news. Ning's rabbit sugarbean has run away. She's an albino rabbit which is quite curvy. If anyone happens to see this rabbit running around Carlingford please give Ning a call at 0425368898.

Anyway, on a happier topic.

The word of the day is:-steph

(v) 1. to temporarily steal someones bag

2. to remove a bag from its origional position as to confuse the owner

Pearl stephed my bag and held it hostage so I would go to the bubblers with her.

(adj)1. someone who enjoys distressing people by temporarily removing their possessions

"Ning stop being such a steph. I know you have my lunch!" accused the hungry Vivian.

Real Blog: Wednesday 16th

Today was probably the most unusual day of the year. Half our class turned up to class and there were about 4 people on the bus, including me and ning. It was also Bishop's birthday. Despite this, i still had a nice time at school.

Downside:

• I missed eddie and everyone else who wasn't shitted to turn up
• Pearl ditched us halfway through school
• We spent ages looking for Pearl's dad so she could ditch us
• I have an ulcer making it a bitch to eat properly

Upside:

• There was a lot of food
• We didn't do much work
• I got a free 1.25L bottle of coke from Joe
• I drank it all

After school at 2:30 Karen, Ning, William and I got driven to Carlo for a mini reunion.

Upside:

• There was a lot of crying
• It was obnoxiously fun pointing out the posers and the genuinely upset in Year 6
• Meeting up
• Calling Ning a bitch and stealing her chair
• Stealing some guys bag

Downside:

• Getting caught by the guy and slapped
• Discovering a spider on Ning's chips just before i was about to eat it
• There weren't as many people as i hoped for

Well word of the day:-

ning(v) 1.to steal and eat someone else's food

2.to eat in a voracious manner

Stephanie ninged my lunch

(adj) 1. hungry or thirsty

"God, I feel so ning," moaned Pearl

thanks, and sorry Ning.

Introduction: Wednesday 16th

Well everybody, welcome to my newly created blog. Just for the record. I will not take any responsibility for any mental depressions or emotional trauma triggered by any posts on this blogspot. In other words avoid reading these blogs if you are pregnant, have a serious medical condition, easily provoked or mentally frail.

Nah, the stuff i say usually isn't that bad. Unless your name happens to be Ning Zhang (hi ning). However, no matter how much she denies it she probably goes under the categories "pregnant" or "easily provoked" or both.

Well that is the introduction to my blog so basically if you don't like what i say, stop reading my blogs. I'll start writing normal blogs later which will probably be much more interesting.